You can't change yesterday, but you can ruin today by worrying about tomorrow. 
Courage and Patience There are times when the "poor me" mood strikes us all. We complain that things are not better. We bemoan our sorry lot in life. We condemn ourselves and others for not meeting our expectations. What can we do when these destructive emotions engulf us? First, we can realize that our "self-pity" is often the result of comparing ourselves with others or to some unrealistic standard of perfection that we think we "should" have reached and have not. What we need to do at times like these is take a fresh look at ourselves and our circumstances. We must evaluate ourselves in relation to ourselves, and avoid comparisons with others. When we view our progress honestly and clearly, in comparison to our own past performances and our own present conditions, we get a better perspective on the strides we have made. Seeing our growth, we can patiently bear our current frustrations because we have overcome our previous struggles and disillusionments. Today I am in competition with no one. I shall seek to better myself by growing beyond where I am. I will be patient with myself and take small steps. I will not expect perfection overnight. |
Hope is a Great Defense
Before I came to Al-Anon, my life was a mess. It was a mockery of the potential I had and an insult to my hopes and dreams. I had goals I wanted to achieve, but despite encouragement from teachers and friends, I couldn't seem to overcome the diseased thinking I inherited from being born into the family dynamic of alcoholism.
The painful insults and verbal abuse I suffered during Childhood still echoed the corridors of my self-esteem and impaired my ability to aspire to be all that God had intended. Then I entered the humble rooms of Al-Anon. Through listening to the member's stories, I learned I wasn't alone. Suddenly I was connected to a community of courageous individuals who showed me that my painful childhood wasn't a result of something I did wrong. I also learned that the disease of alcoholism doesn't discriminate. Eventually, the shame and guilt that was locked into the deepest fibers of my very essence began to fade. Shame and guilt could no longer dwell in the darkness of my confusion, because of the tools I learned in the program. I'm no longer a victim to my painful past. As a child, I didn't have many choices, but I do have choices as a woman. "One Day at a Time," I set goals-no matter how small- and move closer to my aspirations of being a successful writer and someday a wife and mother. I "Keep It Simple" and do the next right thing, careful not to overwhelm myself. I "Let Go and Let God," surrendering my need to control. I understand that I didn't cause my mother's drinking, I couldn't control it, and I can't cure it. I was a child, powerless over adults who ruled my world and powerless over a powerful disease. As an adult, I'm still powerless over alcoholism, but I'm no longer powerless defense of all-hope. Today I'm hopeful that I'll achieve the life I always believed I deserved. Kelly-Ann, Dorchester, Massachusetts March, 2007 Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., Virginia Beach, VA. 
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Today's Hope is a Recovery themed site with a focus on Friends and Families of Alcoholics and problem drinkers. We are not affiliated with any 12 Step program. The daily sharings contain a reading from
Al-Anon's Conference Approved publication The Forum, an inspirational quote/saying and a recovery based reading/meditation. The intent of Today's Hope is to share experience, strength and hope. Please take what you like and leave the rest. |